


Sleigh Bells Ring (When Santa Comes to Visit)

by Thilien



Series: 31 Days of Ineffables Ficlets [6]
Category: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: 31 Days of Ineffables, Aziraphale is "just enough of a bastard to be worth knowing" (Good Omens), Crack, Crowley is Bad at Being a Demon (Good Omens), Crowley is Good With Kids (Good Omens), M/M, Nonsense, Prompt Fill, Snake Crowley (Good Omens), The Author Regrets Everything, The Author Regrets Nothing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-06
Updated: 2019-12-06
Packaged: 2021-02-25 23:14:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,382
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21693625
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Thilien/pseuds/Thilien
Summary: '“I don’t care if it’s Christmas. I’m not doing it.”Crowley’s tone brooks no argument but that doesn’t deter Aziraphale. He’s had a couple of millennia of practice at wrapping the demon around his little finger and he’s determined to make this work. Warlock was only a child after all.'In which a small boy worries that he won't know Santa has been, an angel has a solution, and a demon is roped into yet another hare-brained scheme.Prompt fill for day five of Drawlight's 31 Days of Ineffables advent calendar. Prompt: Sleigh Bells.Warning: This one is utter nonsense - a total crack-fic - but I had a great deal of fun writing it and I apologise for nothing!
Relationships: Aziraphale & Warlock Dowling, Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens), Crowley & Warlock Dowling
Series: 31 Days of Ineffables Ficlets [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1559806
Comments: 5
Kudos: 46





	Sleigh Bells Ring (When Santa Comes to Visit)

**Author's Note:**

> With thanks to Drawlight for coming up with the prompts!
> 
> As always, I don't own any of this. All the good stuff belongs to Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett and to the marvelous people who bought Good Omens to life on the small screen for the enjoyment of us all. 
> 
> Thank you for taking the time to read my fic. Kudos and comments are always VERY much appreciated. Enjoy! x

**Sleigh Bells Ring (When Santa Comes to Visit)**

“I don’t care if it’s Christmas. I’m not doing it.”

Crowley’s tone brooks no argument but that doesn’t deter Aziraphale. He’s had a couple of millennia of practice at wrapping the demon around his little finger and he’s determined to make this work. Warlock was only a child after all. 

A few days earlier, the boy had come running out into the gardens. Aziraphale had been busy trimming one of the smaller trees, giving the garden a final tidy up before the few days of leave that all of the Dowling’s staff got given at Christmas. 

“Brother Francis, Brother Francis!”

Aziraphale and Crowley had both seen slightly less of the boy since he started nursery at the local private school. But he was only in for half days at the moment and, as soon as he was back home after lunch, the child could still usually be found either ‘helping’ Brother Francis in the gardens, or clinging to the skirts of his beloved Nanny until she relented and read him a story. Aziraphale had to admit he’d grown fond of the boy. Children weren’t really his forte but, considering he was the Antichrist, Warlock was really quite a pleasant child. And Crowley, he knew, adored the lad. Not that the demon would ever admit it, of course. 

“Young Master Warlock! Now what can I do for you this afternoon?”

Warlock is slightly out of breath by the time he’s raced across the garden but that doesn’t stop him from hopping slightly with excitement once he skids to a halt next to Aziraphale. Like most five year olds, the boy seems to have an inexhaustible supply of energy. 

“Did you know it’s only _five sleeps_ now until Santa comes?”

Aziraphale smiles. He’s been doing his best to tell Warlock about the true message of Christmas but, like most small children, the lad’s head is currently filled with tales of a jolly fellow in a red suit and his magical present-giving sleigh.

“Is it now Master Warlock?”

“It is! Mrs Appleby says that he’ll land his sleigh and his reindeer on the roof and come down the chimney to leave presents! We have to leave him out a mince pie and a glass of sherry. And we have to leave a carrot for the reindeer.”

Aziraphale trims another branch, nodding along to Warlock’s excitable chatter.

“And she said said that, if we’re very good and all tucked up in bed waiting for him, we’ll hear the sound of the bells on his sleigh! So I’m going to be really good and get to bed super early on Christmas Eve so that I can hear them.” 

Warlock stops, looking momentarily troubled. 

“But how will Santa land on our roof, Brother Francis? Will the Secret Service agents know to let him up land?”

Aziraphale almost laughs at the child’s concerned frown but stops himself just in time.

“Now don’t you worry Master Warlock. I’m sure that Father Christmas will be sure to tell them when he’s going to arrive. If you make sure you continue to be a good boy, he’ll make his delivery for you.”

Warlock nods solemnly. The he brightens.

“I’ll know he’s been when I hear the sleigh bells! Then I can go to sleep!”

Having reached his conclusion, the boy scampers off, racing back across the garden; a tiny five year old whirlwind ready to wreak havoc elsewhere. 

Aziraphale hadn’t thought any more about the conversation with Warlock until he’d overheard Mr & Mrs Dowling earlier this evening. The couple had retreated to one of the many terraces that surrounded the residence and Aziraphale had been locking up the potting shed, making sure everything was secure before the festive break. He hadn’t been intending to eavesdrop but the tone of concern in Mrs Dowling’s voice caught his attention. 

“I don’t know how we’re going to get him to sleep tonight. He keeps saying he’ll stay awake until he hears the bells on Santa’s sleigh.”

“I wouldn’t worry honey. He’s five. He’ll zonk out eventually.”

Mr Dowling is firm and reassuring and, as ever, sounds as if his mind is elsewhere. 

“But that’s just it,” Mrs Dowling continues. “If he doesn’t hear them, he’ll be so disappointed. And I do want him to believe for just that little bit longer…”

“Well he’ll have to learn that it’s us sometime honey..”

“But darling…”

The voices drift off as the couple move back inside. And now Aziraphale is reminded of Warlock’s excited face as he explained his grand plan to wait up and listen for Santa’s sleigh. The boy has an extremely active imagination - a trait that Aziraphale blames entirely on Crowley and his penchant for telling tall tales of dragons and witches and embellished tales about various events throughout history - and, as his mother suspects, will be extremely disappointed if events don’t come off as planned.

Which is when Aziraphale has an idea.

**Later That Evening...**

It’s dark by the time he reaches Crowley’s rooms. Like most of the live-in household staff, Crowley has quarters in the old stable block, close enough to the house to be reached easily in an emergency.

“Angel…?”

The demon looks surprised when she answers the door. Whilst they generally spend at least one evening a week sharing a glass or seven of wine and regaling each other with the week’s events, usually at Aziraphale’s small cottage in the grounds, they hadn’t planned anything over Christmas. Aziraphale had intended to have a quiet celebration of his own the following day. The demon, he suspected, intended to use her two days off to sleep through the whole thing. 

“Crowley. Can I...erm...can I come in?”

**Several Glasses of Wine Later...**

Sometime later, once Aziraphale has told Crowley about Warlock’s predicament, and outlined his grand solution to the problem, he is faced with a stony-faced demon and an adamant ‘no’. 

“But it would be so _easy_ Crowley. And anyway, you quite like being a snake.”

Crowley rolls her eyes.

“Whether I like it or not is neither here nor there angel. I’m not doing it.”

“But why not?”

“Because I’m the Serpent of bloody Eden that’s why not! I am _not_ crawling up a drainpipe with sleigh bells attached to my bloody tail just so that you can indulge a child’s Christmas fancies!” She crosses her arms. “I’ve got a reputation to uphold.”

Aziraphale is undeterred. 

“But it will only take a few minutes. And Warlock will be so upset…”

He can see from Crowley’s expression that this alone will not work. Right, Aziraphale thinks, time to roll out the big guns. Turning to Crowley with what he hopes is a pleading expression, he tries again.

“And it would mean so very much to _me_. I mean, I was rather hoping we could share a small Christmas meal tomorrow but the day would be so tarnished if Warlock was unhappy.”

Crowley rolls her eyes again but he can see he’s hit the mark. Draining her wineglass the demon makes a dramatic sigh.

“Fine. But if you breathe a _word_ about this to _anyone.._ ”

As Crowley proceeds to list the many terribly demonic ways she’ll exact revenge if Aziraphale so much as dares to even mention their planned caper, Aziraphale can only smile to himself at the thought of a small child’s excited face. 

**Christmas Morning**

On Christmas morning, an excitable five year old bursts into his parents’ bedroom shortly after five in the morning. 

“He’s been, he’s been! And I _heard_ him Mom. I heard the bells outside my room!!”

By lunchtime, Warlock still hasn’t come down from the high of his near-encounter with the legendary Santa Claus, and Mrs Dowling is beaming as she watches her boy scamper around happily.

Meanwhile, on the other side of the gardens, an angel and a demon (or a gardener and a nanny, depending on how you look at it), are settling down to a small, but perfectly formed, Christmas dinner. Aziraphale had found a nice bottle of red that he’d been saving for a special occasion.

“You know my dear,” he said as he topped up Crowley’s glass, “I’ve always said you really are quite a _nice_ …”

“Don’t you dare, angel. Don’t you _even_ dare.”


End file.
